I spent the first half of my twenties being anxious about being married and having a family. When I turned 25, I felt like I let myself down (like I have control over being married. lol) I spent the last 5 years trying to imagine life never being married. I can not tell you where this idea that I won’t be worthy of marriage after 30, but I now know that I wasted many years hoping, wondering and missing out on my present moments.

I had a different blog post in mind, but this idea of knowing how to properly love and accept yourself seemed more fitting for February. I believe that the gift of singleness (not married) is understated. Hopefully, after reading this post, my unmarried ladies and men will feel more encouraged to take advantage of this time.

1: Acknowledge Your Freedom

If you are like me, you aren’t married or have children. This means that your time is yours, your resources are yours and your freedom is yours. I didn’t want to experience too much life because I wanted to wait to enjoy them with my husband… That’s not what life should be about. Experience things, travel, try new foods, cut all of your hair and then share those stories with your future spouse and create moments together when the time comes. I was letting someone/a role that does not exist determine what I was or was not doing. Love yourself by being active and intentional in your freedom.

2: Self Control/ Discipline

This is my favorite! This allows you to learn about yourself and teach yourself at the same time; how amazing is that? This is such an important layer in self-love. We all have areas that can use a little more discipline. This can include carving the time to workout, meal plan, work towards skills or hobbies, waking up earlier or simply learn to be disciplined enough to not respond to messages to don’t need to (you know the ones I’m talking about). This requires intimate time with yourself. Quiet time that you spend being honest with your weaknesses, how you WILL manage them and what are you adding into your lifestyle or what are you removing. Take the time to learn how you handle lifestyle changes and invest in yourself. Love yourself by being willing to be uncomfortable for a little while, knowing that the result will be better!

3: Remember To Relax

Let’s be honest, we want to have so much control over our lives. We want to know when we will get a promotion at work, when we will find love, get married and have kids; among other things. Since all of these major life events require other people, we have to remember to relax. Refrain from being so anxious about things you can not control( this is Biblical). Instead, be comfortable and confident that the life that you are currently living, is your best. Love yourself by not allowing the pressure of your future keep you from enjoying the present moments.

Being in a relationship or married does not define you and you shouldn’t speed through your gift of singleness by dwelling on your future.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

From me,

Chrissy